Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in hazenh's LiveJournal:

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Thursday, October 12th, 2006
10:46 pm	nostalgic evnings; with that taste   yunknow!   that smell of your mind. lingerrrs   commonnow!   Nights (dontyou remember in car)   think!   boutnother time (in car) with others and that tingle   thatsthe one…   song correlate feeling of adolescentnecessity that must need a secnd chance give me my ghost self back!self i realize not as fondly, but i do fondly. and fondly kept safe.          P                                                  S                                                   kiss (Comment on this)
Friday, September 29th, 2006
6:38 pm	9.12.06 but it was wet outside. drplets fallen   scents   gleam   purplets   & violets   pinkish alltoo thdark ran twirls. Splats. Form. it’s all too similar and familiar but it was wet outside. Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
Saturday, September 23rd, 2006
5:17 pm	written one by one after one another on 9.22.06 it lost myitself on the road against the church by the damned pepperonis and by solid a solid s.deep under             solid lay lies & dead butterflies.                                                                   the gates close as I see the dimlitted darkness black tepid  suggestionas as I hear those metric sounds closer.                                                                   before this that and rather a trip about Thin k ing about, Thin gs. Maybe.                                                                  step onto the houses with streets and rails, the person jumped   ,near has never been this secure;   when, the clock is one and eleven. life begins. Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
Thursday, September 14th, 2006
6:46 pm	and the watrr wss cold. the rain about, under neith. quickly now, no stop. slowit down down. way down. night of cold wrinkles and warm lights. holiday todayormorrow yet. tomorrow. noringing nothing. then she cutes and all is better. then all is away. no stop. quickly now. no. slowit down down, way down. slow it down. Boring days with such tender excitement. such. Temporary. fix me. She can. Can she. effort to the effortless.need for the needy.   i(sl ow it do wn) can’t want you more. of your effortless.   makeor.move. show me your aggression. as slowr quick as you wishit   t(i ti er) o be. Hazen|&c   (1 Comment |Comment on this)
6:46 pm	if green is green red is red then our love our love is seen is seen             by eyes & ears by mouths by teeth & toenails by lips & hairs & ankles by You. but nevernot me. goodly things, all yet in lands unseen but soonly found. Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:45 pm	two nights ago you tasted like Watermelon. and your earof Strawberries. yesternight a woman wrecked anothers beside me. near and hold me,                 Dear uncertain driving past these - aircontrolled geometricities with the ants inside those ants aren’t you. nor me. so let’s run&hide from these bees.   Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:44 pm	years placed in months months put into days days turned into sentences sentences turned into words words to l.etters letters from ideas ideas of you. only. , here.s the thing, Miss 17 just the start, the first of many yetlestnotnever stopnor         end. these beginnings these ends &firsts now with brownonbrownonbrown monotrifecta on the external but the hidden inside as I idea as I thought let me try. Please to love someone more worthy moreover give me more more transfiction as you sit there, handsinmyhair eyes burning all around and all about and everywhere how can these l e t t e r s describe. Thisthat&every feeling about you so uneasy quit being so difficult! to explain thisandallofmy,       feelings this is you at seventeen these are mine at the same one year sooner to you    lovely. to the best of this svntns to the beginning of yearstomothstodaystosentencestowordstoletterstoideas. tolove. Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:44 pm	it wasis you you the one maybe the pains within this intelligence maybe the pains are you notafar stret   ch I cant even drawyou with capital. Just one. Capital symbol. that would give unto more credit than you willever deserve nonisdue. Not to you stop. with those: lies, smiles “cares” cheers praises denials turnn that one man I love turnedin to some on lessloved it was you all along             ruin.one, shame on you             ruin.beauty, that’s just like you             ruin.she, fucking LET HER BE             ruin.littleshe, a check on the list             ruin.him, whipped like a bitch at your rotting fist             ruin.me, can’tbe. hold that pride close             touch.Her.(innocents), feelourfury             minemostagressive, hers to back mine.  one nights the night of your summertimes setting when those colf deep stones will latch onto. those dissolving watery fingertipsandnails neverlettingloose I won’t be there. nor will onebeauty               beautyshe               shelittle               littleshe               shehim               himme               orme.   noone. should they even glace in the pool? with its denselycovered emotional snarles&webs. its mirky relections… think again tyrant, because weve left without a thought. Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:41 pm	7.23.06 in the morning our faces put on yours extra heavy you’ll need it more than any so progressed by now survival without, a slim theory Masked. Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:40 pm	7.23.06 save me from eden this boring place of few apparents the best    of best    & best        best to do nothing Man squeeks with tribal Man picks a noise blackwhitetight papers fed lead todonetowaste red sockswithholes blue bluebleublew b but to men of you me pick a song song. Mans whitebutblack tan clothing   Mansview of Tolstoy Mansview of stress Mansview of colour Mansview of power Mansview of government Mansview of beauty s! skeletons.    Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:40 pm	7.23.06 need is my necessity want. trivial. everydaynnight gimmygimmy moremore             Ohof that pain. Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:39 pm	5.18.06 shake to and fro             iknowweknewandknow             d.nt alarm, the viewis met, by, beguile-etc. though you may not see,             the lovelyset before me.                         please,neednot-think                                                 Orwonder.             because you mightmay not grasp. the c?rve[s] is’r deemed <<parfaitement>> not by your eyes,but-bymybrowns,             moreperfect,thenseen n-realized,you. you cannot apprehend, flaudednot a touch;   ,the way your skinis,was,will. (as ideala c?e as there ever shall be.) u,ll neverknow,             yet, nottoworry. i know, thoughyoumay x/believe Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:38 pm	4.20.06  a written word.s, .so satifactory. such Is th   e necessity. to feel that calligraphoric-art representation of so much with so little              smudged black circles&lines, subsequently, perfectly. all blunders lovely due unto the leg which, but of course, is nothing less than unflawed.   exact - the crooked tilt of the semi-aged decal, and that torn 3x4 leaf but further than those words,              p.                     rinted‘r vocal, t.                        ranscript‘r speech  n.                        otion‘r otherwise.                  ;printed speech. vocal notions,                 , otherwise futile transcripts.   it’s your preoccupation that speaks, talks, and sounds like that of the transcendent reverberation the resonance of that ink, (which none can hear)   mais Someone does,             and does that not make it worth it all.             worthy of that unparalleled gesture.                         it is hoped to be so. mais, Someone does.   Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:36 pm	4.17.06 it’s almost a fact nowadays that familylove.   Un-conditional.   how little-ly] ,meaningful. if even that so much. family is long since conditional, of that which remains, likeandAs a dead man decays, in his longsince forgotten grave.   ;Grave.   that is how I see this situation.   ;She.   how sneaky, petty, and adolescent unripe as the day goes on. old ways thought to have changed, noteven a chance… still she is unmoved despite --   --    foul expressions pseudo reactions precontrived emotions cloaked responses. and a’takenback visage.             - all of which are found fallacious- ,much like all of her   “Un-conditional”; please, don’t waste precious atmosphere   “Un-conditional”, said in southernmeaningless tones a given. only to some. but not to me, or another one. in fact, another two. compliments mean nothing from your dull blue eyes, they grow more dull each day, with each            lie,                         fib,                         backstab,                         skewed definitions,                         And murky light blues.   she doesn’t deserve it [&] she’ll never change until that day. only a mere 5 years away.                                       Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:35 pm	4.16.06 Comparison, awaits. - so we see the divison. east&west collide. neither perfect, one far less… east has learned for manyayears, 2,500 years, their doctrine remains, unbothered.   Kun Fu-Tzu,   I owe you. as we all do, little do they know… it’s west’s turn now, to learn a little (try somewhat). to finally stop the droning of our trumpet of Philistinism   - seclusion. Ha, you think it great. greatly it is not, not indeed. look across that water, regard the success.                   success that is not fueled by money, or other such things. etc.&t.etcetera. but that of: honour.respect.family.socialunity.safety. but inlightof, you keep your face implanted in the prideful state of nation. a nation which can agree on hardly, and does little to   ---   discipline.   that is the concept which is most lacking, and it is also the one. that cannot be lived without.   Hazen|&c         (Comment on this)
6:35 pm	4.20.06 Japanese Dream - a hidden rebirth lays quiescent, slightly hinted, partially awakened. soon to be, as dominant. austere             to the eye’s of the beholder, t                                   hriving to the eye of the Honourable. to which they hold so high. stringent,                       yes.     yet diligence.honour.duty.pride.distinguishment. all held higest. economy plays no part, as it does over there. social order reigns true. the rigid runs through,                         like the blood the Eagle sheds. and the other side sees as unjust.inhumane.untollerable. nevertheless, no locks.alarms.bells.police(hardly) needed. did you ever wonder why ( ? ) try to disprove, I know you will try. have tried. and failed.   - they’ve learned the west. - now let us, reap the east.   Hazen|&c   (Comment on this)
6:34 pm	4.16.06 American Dream - the ability to success by means necessary .to no one honour bring?s,        nothing, it sounds as if        pathetic lies you tell each other about the seen ignorant, take your head from the sandy, trash filled Destin sand… look around, is this really your dream ( ? ) crime, divorce, rap?e   ,Oh wait; you just wanted to be successful,   pay no heed to the surrounding                              people.culture.poverty.                              crime.divorce.rape. just look for your wealth.   ,No, stop; you just wanted to be successful,   by whichever means you seek fit… no limit tables, a slap on the wrist no ethical conscience. what is the need ( ? ) redwhite&blue, apparently I owe you civil unrest, as I look behind my neck to see it. do I need to see it ( ? ) it’s all around, no need to hurt that pompous little neck of yours put that head down,  you need not be conceited.          you deserve it not. you mock across an Ocean. for what you see as unfit,       oh, I daresay. It is fit,               robust,               & yes, It;they;he;she;them --- are more superior than you.     Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:33 pm	4.12.06 [Ceux] rose coloured glasses      n-v-r r-ally        work-d      for m-      oh no,not until that one.      frigid.      February evening. it all came to pass. but notevertoo quickly.                           Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:32 pm	4.9.06 [Et] I wake up cheerless.                         why is this so?                         strange, I confound. Comprehend ( ? )…outofthe?             sit here                      trying                             to fin d                                     a reason.             one, willyou come ( ? ) seconds elapsed, minutes gone to waste. hours vanished. all within the blink of one and sometimes four, eyes.    thi s is the a reason. thatisthereason.             timewithout,you.             isn’t really time at all.                         and it makes the mornings,                                                 everso - painful                                                               dismal                                                               uninviting. I don’t invite yousun. unless you bring back those hours past. or the couldhavebeen memoirs. they could have been,                         maybe that’s the reason.                         goddamnit,                         toomany reasons.             these times I fear to waste.thebiggest fear of all.             it is                 Thebiggest fear, of all.                             Hazen|&c (Comment on this)
6:29 pm	4.5.06 A Prelude by the name of… Awakened.   Awakened, to and by, those mono – Cides. Toxins feel filtrated by the prickles of my nose. Rolled out into the coldly room and peer out that smog-stained pane. Hoping to see sunlight, that would gleam. But there was no gleam, although, I was not looking at the sky. Oh no. But of those people. Those dreary, mundane, dependents… on drinks on drugs on magazines on features of which no profitability can be acquired. What a waste, what a waste. What a waste of a somewhat (maybe to be.) sun-drenched morning. The sun of existence/living/purpose/meaning. Yes, It must riseandset another day.                                                                         Hazen|&c (Comment on this)